Romans 5:8 - "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
As a retiring perfectionist, I have always had the need to be 'perfect' or produce a perfect work whenever I embarked on any project. This could be something as big as a work or school assignment, and something as small as sending a personal email. This habit has crept into my life as a Christian and has in so many ways affected my walk with God. First thing I would like you to note as you read on is that being a perfectionist will hinder your relationship with God more than it will enhance it.
A perfectionist is “a person who strives for flawlessness and sets excessively high-performance standards for themselves, accompanied by overly critical self-evaluations and concerns regarding others’ evaluations.” To a perfectionist, there is no room for mistakes and it's always about the end result which means that they are often hard on themselves. They spot mistakes even when everyone around them sees nothing wrong. I want to make it clear that there is nothing wrong in holding yourself to high standards or wanting to achieve something great. There is however a thin line between perfectionism and setting high standards for yourself. If you think like a perfectionist in your walk with God, it will actually prevent God from doing his perfect work in you. It will prevent you from going back to God when you make a mistake or when you sin. In Luke 5:31-32, Jesus said that healthy people do not need a doctor, only sick people do. Jesus did not come to call those who are flawless, he came to call those who admit that they are flawed, and from our understanding of the bible, that is everyone! Ecclesiastes 7:20 ' Not a single person on earth is always good and never sins' (NLT). God is the only one that truly knows you; your past, present, and future and loves you anyway. There is absolutely nothing you will do that can ever separate you from the love of God; not your weakness, your past sins, not the crime you will commit tomorrow, not your flaws and not even you can separate you from the love of God. He loves you, flaws & all.
In my own short journey in life, I have come to realize that there is no perfection outside of God. We are all humans, flawed and beautifully created to fulfil purpose. We will make mistakes, lots and lots of them but it does not make us less worthy. For a few years now I have wanted to restart this blog because I always felt led and drawn towards this ministry. But I just always had thoughts that made me define myself as 'unqualified' for this; "what will I say? I'm not even the best person to be doing this. I am not the most creative writer. There are people already blogging about Christ so what else do I have to say? I am a perpetual sinner so if I start, I'm probably going to fall at some point and then God is not going to want to use me anymore. God is still working in me so let me wait till I have attained a certain level of 'holiness' before I can begin". In a nutshell, I was basically saying to myself, 'You are flawed. You are not qualified enough for this'. Don't get it twisted, I still don't think I'm qualified. But with God's call, it is not about you or your qualification because frankly none of us would be qualified. It's about God and his power that works in us to do his will. God factored in your 'shortcomings' when he called you. He knew Moses was stuttered, he knew Samson was a womanizer, he knew Jacob was a cheater, he knew Rahab was a prostitute, he knew Abraham and Sarah were old, he knew Paul was a murderer, he knew Thomas was a doubter, he knew Elijah was suicidal, he knew David was an adulterer, a murderer, a liar and yet he was a man after God's heart. He knows I'm flawed and yet he chose me. God doesn't want you because you are flawless, he loves you even with all your imperfections and he wants to use you anyway.
When we realize that God wants us just the way we are, it is actually very humbling because it reveals that what we then become is not by our own hard work or intelligence; we are what we are by the Grace of God. Moses, who was a wanted murderer, became the savior of the Israelites. How Ironic! Paul, a persecutor of Christians became one of the greatest apostles to ever live. God specializes in TRANSFORMATION. TRANSFORMATION is 'a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance. - a process by which one figure, expression, or function is converted into another that is equivalent in some important respect but is differently expressed or represented'. He takes us, flawed human beings, and transforms us into beautiful vessels. I have yet to read anywhere in the bible where God said Moses stopped stammering before he could use him. God used Moses even with his stammer and so where all the other people in the bible that he used. Not one of them was flawless. So, get rid of the idea that you need to be perfect and flawless before you can come to God. If you think you can be perfect outside of God, then what do you really need God for?
I was led to name this blog 'Flaws & All' because it reflects exactly what this blog means to me. The blog is about obedience even when I feel unqualified for what I'm being asked to do. My decision to restart this blog is not because I think my writing is now flawless or my knowledge of God is now 'complete' that I can now share it with the world. It is actually the opposite. My writing and editing skills still need a lot of work, my relationship with God is a daily commitment filled with highs and lows, but God is reminding me every day that he wants me to come to him, flaws and all. This blog is not about perfection. It is about obedience, learning, progression and growth and that's what Christianity is really all about.
I hope this encourages you to come to God, flaws and all. He loves you anyway and would love if you just come and talk to him about it instead of running away from him. You are loved, You are wanted, You are worth it. If you make a mistake along the way, that's okay! Keep coming back because God is never going to get tired of receiving you. I'll leave you with one of my favorite verses from one of my favorite people in the bible, Paul. Philippians 3:12-14 - "12 It’s not that I have already reached this goal or have already been perfected, but I pursue it, so that I may grab hold of it because Christ grabbed hold of me for just this purpose. 13 Brothers and sisters, I myself don’t think I’ve reached it, but I do this one thing: I forget about the things behind me and reach out for the things ahead of me. 14 The goal I pursue is the prize of God’s upward call in Christ Jesus". Come to God just as you are and I promise when he is done with you, You will be amazed at what you will become. God is such a show-off and I love it. Allow him to show-off with you.